Finding out I was pregnant with baby number 4 was a huge shock. I was on the pill so it wasn’t planned. Aaron and I was a huge bag of nerves. Would we cope with four? Where will we put everything? Can we afford another one? But as soon as I seen that little pea on the screen I just knew. I knew that whatever happened we would be fine. We’ve done it three times already, what’s one more?
Pregnancy was easy, probably one of the best pregnancies I’ve had. As a family we went through a huge loss in January, my mother in law passed away and we was all heartbroken. I was so upset that she wouldn’t get to meet the baby. We’d told her baby was a boy and we was going to call him Ralph. And then the pandemic kicked in.
Who would have thought that there would be a global pandemic and the whole world would come to a standstill. I was 7 months pregnant when the country went into lockdown. I was scared, nervous and didn’t know what to think. Would Aaron be there for the birth? How would I get the rest of the baby stuff when everyone was going crazy and stockpiling?
I was supposed to see my midwife every 2 weeks after 32weeks to check my blood pressure. I have a blood clotting disorder that makes me more likely to get a blood clot and pre-eclampsia. I didn’t hear of her at all. I didn’t know what was happening. I had a scan at the hospital at 37 weeks and had to attend alone. It was crazy. The hustle and bustle of the hospital was none existant. There was hardly anyone there and there was screens up, people with masks and face shields. It was quite daunting.
I knew I’d have to have an elective cesarean as I’d already have two. They booked me in for my section at 34 weeks so I knew what date I was having him. I was nervous about having another section. If you’ve had one then you know the pain afterwards. It’s not nice at all. 15th of May. That was the date I was booked in, at exactly 39 weeks gestation.
When I went for my last scan they did my booking bloods and all the paperwork so I didn’t have to do it on the day. So then it was just a waiting game.
Lockdown happened, I was seeing notices about birthing partner’s not being allowed. I didn’t want to do it on my own. I wanted Aaron there to see his son being born. I wanted the support and to know I wasn’t on my own.
The 15th of May, I had to be on the maternity ward for 7.30am. I wasn’t allowed anything to eat or drink from 8pm the night before. Aaron wasn’t allowed to come on to the ward with me so he dropped me off and I told him I’d ring him when it was nearly time for me to go to theatre.
The first thing they did when I got there was do a Covid test. Apparently everyone who they knew would be staying 24hours had to have one. The nurse did it for me, it wasn’t pleasant at all. It felt so uncomfortable and made me gag. Then the doctors came round and spoke to all four of us who was on our bay. I was told I was third on the list and would be going down around dinner time.
Dinner time came, Aaron arrived on the ward but had to stay in the family room and wasn’t allowed up near me. The second lady came back with her baby and I was so excited I was next. But they took the other lady. The nurse came over and explained that the other lady had complications so was going first and I’d be going down at about 3pm.
I was hungry, thirsty and just wanted Aaron. I sat and sobbed. I waited and waited. 3pm came and went. I was dehydrated. I had to have a cannular in to give me fluids, but my veins had shrunk from dehydration. 8 attempts later and they finally got the cannular in. Bruised, tired and fed up. I couldn’t stop crying.
Finally at 5.30pm they came and got me. Luckily Aaron was allowed down to theatre with me, it was just the ward he wasn’t allowed. I was taken in and given a spinal block. I can’t believe how different it was to my others. Everyone in the room was in purple PPE, head to toe, as well as masks and face shields. Aaron and myself had to wear a mask through the whole thing which felt so strange. I lay there patiently waiting, i’d asked if the screen could be uncovered when they pulled him out so we could get a video. The surgeon nearly forgot so we only got a little video.
At 18.38 our little boy made his entrance weighing a tiny 5lb 8oz. I couldn’t believe how small he was. And he had no hair! Even the midwife said “ooh he’s bald.” Our first bald baby 😂
When they’d finished stitching me up, we was taken round to recovery where Aaron was allowed to stay for 15 minutes or so and then he had to go home and I was taken back to the ward.
I thought that the care would of been better. I was left to fend for myself. No help from anyone even though I couldn’t move. My catheter was taken out later than it should of been and I was left lay and covered in a pool of blood so I was really sore.
It definitely wasn’t my best experience there. I know midwife’s and nurses are stretched but I was really disappointed with my care. It may have been my fourth child but regardless I think I still needed the support.
And here we are now, nearly 4 months later. Winging life, winging motherhood and taking everyday as it comes.
Thank you for taking the time to read and I hope you’ve enjoyed my post.
2 thoughts on “Ralph James Damian Swift”
Congratulations on your little one. He’s so cute!
What an experience to have even it sounds awful. You’ve had three babies already so know how different it feels. I can’t imagine how all these first time mums are feeling if you’re experience is anything to go buy.
That is definitely true. My experience wasn’t the best.
Hopefully first time mum’s have had a bit more care than what I got. I think because it was baby number four I was just left because I knew what I was doing. And it shouldn’t be like that really. No matter what number baby, it’s still nerve-wracking xx
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